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Blog The Blog Parenting Issues My Kids are Idiots: Volume II | My Kids are Idiots: Volume II | | Print | |
| Written by Joeprah | |
I love my kids. They rule. Sometimes though, they push my buttons. You know, like when you just got done cleaning the house and they run through with mud on their shoes. Well, mine would never do that out of fear for their lives. The things they do are subtle and yet still very destructive. They plant little 'bombs' all around the house for me to find, and most often I find these 'bombs' when its too late. That sufficiently sets the picture I believe. Enter my middle child. She is artsy and likes to do her own thing. She is as sweet as they come but forgets what you tell her the second you say it because she is thinking about other things in her head. Anyways, she made me a picture the other day out of a flower from her dance recital bouquet , tape and some of her heralded imagination. The only problem was she never actually gave me the picture--that plus she modified the reverse side of the picture (see below).  When I picked up the paper, I saw the flower petals on the front and thought to myself, "Ah, so creative." Then I saw like, oh--I dunno--500 ants scurying around under the lifted picture. I also noticed that the paper was abnormally heavy, almost weighted somehow. Upon flipping the paper I saw what had been causing both the sea of ants and added weight. My daughter had been eyeing up a Cadbury Egg and apparently got the nerve to take it with out permission. She chopped it in half and stuck it to the paper where it stayed like it was rubber cemented (ironically, this is how she sat in her time out chair). A) Don't take daddies Cadbury Eggs, and B) Do not invite ants into my domain, either offense is timoutable (wrd? sp?) but together it makes for nasty cocktail of jumping jacks and a lengthy timeout. Respect.
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