Humor
Cross Eyed KidIn this section of Joeprah you will be whisked away to all the side splitting posts that made this site what it is. Videos, photos, articles--this stuff is just funny.
 
Confessions of a Stay at Home Dad
Confessions of a Stay at Home Dad Confessions of a Stay at Home Dad is a candid look at parenting, marriage and life through the eyes of a stay at home dad.  
 
Blogging Tips
BloggingThis section is has useful information from the practical to the technical.  Want to improve your blog or website?  Take a look here. 

  Register

Total Joeprah Members

254 registered

Users Online

Total: 2
Members: 0 / Guests: 2
No members online

 

>

These Ads Crack Me Up

.::Helpful Parenting Links::.

Examiner Promo

Joeprah's Newsletter:

What you waitin' for? Subscribe already!
Joeprah the Newsletter


Receive HTML?

You and Your Voyeuristic Child | Print |  E-mail
Written by Joeprah   
 
on Wednesday May 21, 2008
Editor's rating No rating
Average user rating 9.5/10   (2 votes)
Views 566    
Favoured 55

I think there is absolutely ‘a time’ when, as a dad to daughters, you notice, “You know what, being naked around the girls feels weird.”  This naked awareness is a cultural change in a household like ours that is used to having young kids just bumbling in on my wife and I when we are getting dressed.  I mean, lately I have been getting the impression that my 8 year old, who I have made an effort to not be naked around for a little while now, is on a secret scientific mission to gather data about her naked father and make him feel completely uncomfortable in the process.  It didn’t happen gradually either, I mean for her perhaps, but when you notice a kid staring at you in the shower and they have nothing to say, you can’t help but to feel self conscious.  My 8 year old now looks at me differently when I am getting dressed, undressed, and especially when I am recently out of the shower (see hawt). 

Our house has a split brain personality when it comes to the topic of being concealed.  You see, my wife is diametrically opposed to humility in all its forms.  I am convinced it has nothing to do with a personal belief or fancy political statement, but rather the fact is she has somehow remained oblivious to kids and female family members who are eyeing up her nakedness.  You see, my wife is Anatomical Dadthe type of lady that will always treat our bathroom/bedroom/heck upstairs as her personal locker-room—she just doesn’t care.  On the other hand, I really don’t like to be just “out there” any more than I need to be.  They call it junk for a reason people.  Anyways, my wife will lead my daughters in and out of our bathroom/bedroom no matter what amount of clothes I am currently wearing.  This has never been and issue and remains a non issue with our two younger daughters (ages 5 & 3).  My 8 year old though…she stares. 

I feel like an object.  I will be getting dressed in our room and my 8 year old will happen by and just kind of stand there with her mouth agape checking me out.  It doesn’t matter at what point I am in the process of getting dressed, just the prospect of seeing dad getting dressed is enough to gain an audience.  I am not getting amorous stares mind you, but rather cold, scientific, “what the heck is that” stares.  So for all you dads out there that have kids approaching the “age of reason,” as I like to call it, here is a list of ways to know when you are getting “checked out.”

  • Silence in your naked or half naked presence - silence from youngsters is always questionable and usually a sign that something is amiss.  So, it stands to reason that when your children are quiet they are probably thinking—thinking about your gross misshapen body.
  • Staring – This is a dead give away.  If you notice your child staring at you then you know they have reached the threshold of naked awareness and there is no turning back. 
  • Child has some stupid reason to come into your bathroom while you are in the shower – you will know that you have been duped if after they come into your bathroom you notice silence and perhaps staring (staring in this case only applies to bathrooms with stand up showers surrounded by plexi-glass).
  • Pauses – If you child starts talking to you as you are getting dressed and abnormally and repeatedly pauses you may be getting checked out.
  • You are stalked – This happens when a child actually sneaks around to get a better look at you.  A voyeuristic child is a child that needs to be stopped.  It's weird, it's wrong and it's creepy as a mutha.

Once again, to write this article, I turned to Twitter Land and got some great input from these folks:

Thanks!  Bottom line, there is no way to know which is the right age to cover yourself up and with which kid this is necessary.  Some kids might not ever (meaning until they are teens) seem awkward in the presence of genitalia.  Some kids might seem more aware of nakedness and more inquisitive at a very early age.  It is a subjective question that I think each family needs to deal with in a way that suits them best.  For instance, Europeans seem to have less, if any aversion to being naked in front of their family members let alone strangers, but their culture is theirs, and yours is yours. What are some rules that have worked for you?  Are you getting “checked out?” How does that make you feel?  Do you have any good stock picks?  Wait, what are we talking about again?

Please Enter New Tags Separated By Comma's
Or Close

Powered by Joomla Tags




All You Gots to Do is Click
Reddit!Del.icio.us!StumbleUpon!Spurl!Newsvine!Blinklist!Furl!Fark!Blogmarks!Squidoo!BlinkBits!Free social bookmarking plugins and extensions for Joomla! websites!


Users' Comments (29) RSS feed comment
Posted by fragileheart, on Wednesday May 21, 2008 , , Guest
Hm... I don't know that I will ever feel comfortable being naked in front of my opposite sex child... or even same sex child for that matter. No matter what age. Is that just because I don't have kids yet?
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Loomis2, on Wednesday May 21, 2008 , , Registered
No, I have two girls, 4 and 3, and I haven't felt comfortable being naked in front of them since they could form a complete sentence. If I had a boy would it be different? Perhaps. Lord knows my wife has no problem walking around naked in front of them, but her mom did the same when she was young {shudder}. 
 
I'm probably just shy like that. My wife's never seen me naked either and we've been married 8 years!
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by jt12blk, on Wednesday May 21, 2008 , , Registered
Yikes. I put the lid on any nakedness around my daughters when my oldest was eighteen months old. After that she might be able to pick out the noticeable difference between me and herself. I'm a full-fledge prude with a super-sized sense of modesty, and that's perfectly fine with me.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by jasonrothlv, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
I think it's natural curiousity at that age. Simply put, you're different than her and her sisters. She's going what all that "junk" is about.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by rolii, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
Our situation at home regarding nakedness is basically about me running around trying to get dressed out of my kids' sight (boys or girls, no matter, I don't want little sets of eyes fixed on me as I get dressed). This means sometimes using the kids' rooms, since they've all but turned our bedroom into their usual hangout. On the hand you've got my wife who loves walking around with whatever she's got on (if anything at all). I keep telling her that she should be a little bit more careful when the boys (already 8 and 6)are around.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by rachel, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
Dude, did you read my V Word post from Monday or what? LOL. 
Great read, as always. Naked daughters and Daddies trying to hide from them or Naked Daddies and daughters stalking them really make for amusement for moms, just FYI :-)  
 
 
i have something for you, it's over on my place. Come see.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Ed (zoesdad), on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
I lost all modesty when I had kids. I draw the line when it comes to the "paperwork" in the library. 
 
But I don't have a voyeur. That would creap me out.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Big Bad Daddy, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
Being a father of 2 girls I'm definitely aware of this one. I don't spend much time in front of them naked, not intentionally, I just don't spend that much time naked period. The fact that the 2yr old can say the word naked, in context, leads to some pretty funny exchanges though. Both the 2 & 5 yr olds have a slight misconception about naked however. Anytime they see a man with no shirt on he is "NAKED!" hee, hee, hee. We'll be at the park on a hot day and they'll point and ask "Why is that man naked daddy? I can see his boobs."which I follow up with "Boys don't have boobs honey, that's his chest." I do get the shower check-out, and the scientific "Why are you peeing standing up?" stares however.
 
» Reply to this comment...

9/10
Posted by PracticallyJoe, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
My daughters, while at that age, had younger boy cousins, finding them much easier to study than their uncooperative dad. And I can't recall ever seeing my mother naked as a child (me being the child in this case).
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by crunchy carpets, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
Mine just point and laugh
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by matt, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
I have to be honest with you, man. This one terrifies me. Frankie is only three, an hasn't adopted the gaping stare yet. I still don't think she realizes there's any difference between us...she still runs at me to give me a hug, full throttle, and rams her head into the ole family jewels every time. One of these days she's going to figure out it aint a Ken Doll down there and start asking questions. Thats when I run away.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Mama Bear, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
due to the fact that my children's grandfather, my father-in-law is a full fledged nudist we had to teach our children about the human body and such at a young age. A very young age. Mr. Husband, wears boxers or pajama bottoms until he is safely tucked in bed now, because he feels a tad uncomfortable in front of Miss Micheyla, but trust me we deal with grandpa's whangdoodle hanging out all of the time.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Huckdoll, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
Hmmm, this was funny! 
 
Baby Daddy often walks around shirtless, but that's the extent of nakedness in front of our daughters. He is horrified if they catch a glimpse of his butt...and they're only 2. Jeez. 
 
I one the other hand, take a stance quite like Hot Wife.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Natural, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
this was funny joe. my daughter stares, she tugs, she lifts, she peeks...mostly at me. she wont see daddy in his bday suit..he shows enough with just clothes on.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Audubon Ron, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Guest
Know what I think? I think she has a Sixth Sense. I think she’s seeing ghosts behind you. Know what I mean? Six Sense dude. Scare-wee. 8)
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Birdie, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
I knew I wasn't crazy! Back when my Bubby was about 6 we went to Memphis to see the king, so we were staying in a hotel with these awful mirrors in the dressing area & entry. They had it fixed up so the mirror on the wall in the entry area let you see directly into the mirror in the dressing area & vice versa. Course didn't realize that. While I was changing, I looked up and could have sworn my little man was completely staring at me! I yelled at Big Daddy in my horror and he shot me down...he never believed little Bub would ever do such a thing.  
We stopped letting them hang around when we were sans clothing around age two or three. Sis still has memories of me, Big D & her in the shower together. I can only hope she doesn't remember details. Personally, I could live my entire life happily having never seen my parents "stuff".
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Whata Woman, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
This is for my husband. You know it's time to get dressed in private when......your kid reaches over, grabs on, and yells "HONK! HONK!" while pulling with all their might.....and "Daddy you have a mustache on your penis!" Nuf said.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Momo Fali, on Thursday May 22, 2008 , , Registered
This is why my husband gets dressed in the closet (and it's not a big closet either).
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Nina, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Guest
UGH! My son is a total voyeur. :x :eek Granted he's only 2, but he will actually bend down and look up to get a better look at what Mommy's got going on down there. When he first did it he actually moved my towel out of the way so he could get a better look. Uhmmmmm......go away!!!! LOL!! My husband thought it was hilarious, I was a little nervous. o_O LOL! So yeah, I have one of those as well, but he's only 2. I guess boys start at an earlier age than girls do. LOL!!!!
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Melisa, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Registered
Being in a house full of males, I started changing clothes behind closed doors a long, long time ago. And so did they (my sons). We have no problems talking about bodies and all that stuff you need to talk about with kids, but the last time my boys saw me sans clothing was probably around the age of 4. (Them, not me. LOL) 
 
I do remember, when passing by my parents room on occasion, seeing my dad walking around in his briefs and thinking, "eew." But I was older than your oldest: I was probably around 11 or 12. I think yours is just curious, and totally normal for her age. (That's MY diagnosis, anyway!)
 
» Reply to this comment...

10/10
Posted by Wayfaring Wanderer, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Registered
Thank you, thank you, thank you, for making an attempt at sparing your children. Not that you don't look good naked or anything like that - I don't know & never will. But by golly, my Mom used to gross me the hell out when she walked around buck naked!! I don't ever think I even saw my Dad in boxer shorts......
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by K8spade, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Guest
My daughter is 10 months old, and my husband doesn't like being naked around her. I told him he'll be ok until she was around 2, and then after that he's probably justified in putting the boys away.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Bad Momma, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Guest
I have the opposite problem. I have all boys. I think Age 3 is the magic # in our house that I noticed curious eyes trying to catch me naked. My youngest is my problem child. He is 7 and still tries to "cop a feel" by "accident" of course. He takes after his dad! :eek
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Hockeyman, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Guest
Thanks for the heads up. I am at 4 and 2 right now, but since birth I have made sure I am always fully clothed waist down or the door is locked. I don't ever want the stare or "the question" :eek
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by ourcrookedtree, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Registered
You know what "they" say; "every child developes at different rates". I guess my 3 year old Little Man is ahead of things. The other day he brought me my robe while I was getting out of bed and said "mommy, put on your robe, I don't want to see you naked". Way to crush a gal's ego.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Corey~ Living and Loving, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Registered
oooooooooo what a fun post. :) 
 
My sugar (3.5) and I still bathe together....heck she still nurses, so she is pretty familar with my body, and I doubt she'll ever get more curious than she is now. We talk pretty openly about our bodies. Hubby is always completely covered from the waist down since she was about 18 months. I am really not certain what is appropriate or not when it comes to daughters seeing fathers naked. It is really interesting to think about though. thanks for the food for thought. 
 
have a great weekend Joe! Sorry I have been a tad MIA. life is crazy busy! I have been reading...just not commenting as much.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Jo Beaufoix, on Friday May 23, 2008 , , Guest
Mr B still has baths with my girls occasionally and is mostly comfortable in front of them though Miss E is coming up 8 now so that may change. A comment from Miss M (3) made him think a bit ago as she asked me why Daddy was wagging? Snort. It made me howl, but he got dressed pretty darn quick. :D
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by Christine @ Serenity How?, on Saturday May 24, 2008 , , Guest
Our family situation is a lot like yours. The kids had an all access pass to our room/bathroom/closet and I never thought much of it. My husband started feeling weird about it maybe a year ago. He didn't get stared at. He got the point and comment and that was pretty much the beginning of the end for him. Now the girls have to ask first before coming in. 
 
The problem is, I'm the one who keeps forgetting and letting the kids in without checking if the coast is clear first. I'm much more laid back about it, but it's probably because we have girls. 
 
I know he's right about the whole thing and I respect it. I just have to get used to it.
 
» Reply to this comment...

Posted by prin, on Sunday May 25, 2008 , , Guest
What it comes down to is art vs functionality. Like the woman's body is art, and everybody understands that from the minute they're born, but finding something attractive in a man's body, well... it's an acquired taste. :D 
 
I'm not sure I could ever be nekkid in front of my kids, but then again, I'm already nekkid in front of my neighbors half the time (accidentally), so that might change. :D
 
» Reply to this comment...

Add your comment



mXcomment 1.0.6 © 2007-2008 - visualclinic.fr
License Creative Commons - Some rights reserved
< Prev   Next >
Parenting
Joeprah and His Girls This section is dedicated to both personal observations and news associated with parents and parenting.  How has being a stay-at-home dad to three daughters changed me as a person?  What are the hot button news stories concerning kids and parenting?  This section is your destination if you are looking for anything and everything dealing with parenting.  Join in on debates, vote on polls, let your voice be heard.  
Joeprah
Joeprah Who is Joeprah?  I am a stay at home dad to three daughters.  I have an amazing wife, and under the direction and encouragement of close friends, I started this site over a year ago.  You can follow me at The Examiner.com, Twitter, Stumble Upon and Cre8BuzzRead more...

 

What is "Team Joeprah?" Read more...