McDonaldsThe number one distributor of toys in the world is McDonalds and nearly all of these toys I would classify as being annoying. They are either poorly constructed or they serve little to no purpose or most notably they make annoying sounds. Recently, our family has collected a few McDonald’s toys both to our shame and our children’s delight. Most of these toys are simply thrown away when the kids aren’t looking, because let’s face it—they’re trash to begin with. However,

some toys remain hidden in the depths of our minivan and only announce their presence during bumps we hit it the road. Enter Kung Fu Panda. Kung Fu Panda was a pretty cool movie, humor, Jack Black, kung fu…what’s not to like? The McDonald’s toys apparently. The panda made a karate chop sound effect noise and a Jack Black sounding “Hi-Yah!” We had a pair of these creatures somewhere imbedded in our minivan.  The only way to identify that they actually existed at all was the presence of the occassional sound effect. 

This past weekend we made a trip to Cape May and on our way home the duo of toys sounded off around 200,000 times much to my dismay.  Around karate chop sound ninety-five-thousand, I realized that I now hated Jack Black and I also hated karate chop sound effects (which I proudly make on my own from time to time)—oh, and I was most likely driven clinically insane (albeit temporarily) from the assault of cheaply manufactured McDonalds toys noises. The insanity that had claimed a section of my brain could only be exercised if I faced my foes and vanquished them in a field of battle. If you don't know this, there is a cleansing ritual that any parent can utilize to release themself from the hold of McDonald's toy induced insanity--you need to obliterate the toy in question.  Feel free to watch the following instructional video:

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 Do you hate McDonald's toys as much as I do?  The American Idol toys were also maddening for us.  Any toys throw you over the edge?

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I make no apologies for my blog. I make no claims to be accurate, influential, harmless, harmful or impervious to criticism. Like Mel Brooks once said...

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